Housekeeping – a thankless activity that seems to need redoing almost immediately after being completed. At our house the deal is whoever is bothered the most does the chore. Cleaning up after 2 adults is marginally more work than cleaning up after myself and I am not nearly as dedicated to snow shoveling or grass cutting as Fred is. I try to collect few chores together to do on the same day but mostly we clean as we go. Do you feel like clean as you go or save up to have satisfyingly visible effects?
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Now that's an interesting question, @Cass M. My rule has always been, "He who complains about how the job gets done gets the job." I've learned to complain about very little, over the years. One of the first things to fall by the wayside was my mother's insistence on folding towels lengthwise into thirds, then horizontally in half. Oh, they look lovely hanging that way on the rack, but somewhere between the dryer and shoving them into the linen closet, I'll take folded any which way they're...shove-able. And if I could get the kids to pitch in on this simple task (it's a good one for young children, as towels can't break and it's hard to really mess it up), so much the better. So I wouldn't quibble over perfect thirds and halves. They could roll the damned things, and I'd be happy.
When it comes to the dishwasher, I prefer to load or wash by hand - it's as you said, for "satisfyingly visible effects," I think. A sense of accomplishment. Putting things away in their proper place has never been my strong suit. CLEANING things is far more satisfying and easy (though as I get older and getting on and off the floor a whole lot less fun, perhaps "easy" is not the word).
Housekeeping? Only when necessary these days, since I live alone and no one but me sees the place. I mostly just let things go until I start to become annoyed by the mess. There are too many other things to do with my time and life is too short to waste it on thankless tasks. On my deathbed I won't be wishing I had cleaned the sinks more often. 😝
Yeah, but when you go, your next of kin are going to moan and groan about what a slob you'd become, ha. Yeah, I'm planning on it. I'll be so old that I could get away with it, I'm sure.
Grimm can only do so much while standing due to severe back injury. Used to be the only vacuum we had was this big arse bulky corded monster, which he had no problem moving, but I did. So, after I got out of the Hospital last June, having lost 90lbs and a hell of a lot of muscle-mass...I couldn't move the damned thing at all, so no vacuuming for far too damned long.
I finally got fed up and bought a cordless 3-part light vacuum with removable & cleanable filter, as powerful as the dust-buster of old..and which I can easily handle. Housekeeping is a LOT easier now, so it happens more often.
Grimm does, however, rules Running the Dishwasher..as he believes Only He Can Stack It Correctly. So I let him.
When I was working the early AM shift, any housekeeping had to wait until the 'weekend' (Sunday morning). I tried to catch up to family and friends on Saturday.
Minor housekeeping chore day today. Vacuuming needs to be done, but not badly, so to wait a couple days will be fine. Other stuff I do is on the go mostly - wife has her workplace, and I'm still in work from home mode so will notice and do more things during the week.
I have always done most of the housework... I also have the lower tolerance for grunge, clutter and dust (thanks to my allergies). So besides being the main shopper and cook, I am also the dishwasher, bathroom scrubber, kitchen scrubber, Laundry person, dusterman, sweeper, polisher, low level handy man etc.
My wife does the ironing, but she's the one who has the wardrobe most reliant on such, and she does the accounting (that's her profession and she is very picky about such so she gets to handle it rather than complain like crazy).
She also used to do the mending when it came to clothes but with her work overload for 5+ years going and bouts with depression has pretty much abandoned such.
For a very short time (about a month when I was recovering from my surgery) she had taken over the housework and the shopping, and hated it and how much time it took and how it seemed endless.
I don't save up housework, it would never get done if I did, It is a constant 7 days a week, and probably eats up one or two hours a day (and if you add in the shopping becomes a good solid part time job of 20 hours a week).
It used to be worse, when there was 3 of us living here, as our former housemate was not the type to do any housework...even after she moved out when she married she had to hire a maid to come in twice a week for about 8 hours in all to clean up after her and her husband.
Well, I couldn't vacuum for SEVEN months because my vacuum was being repaired. It wasn't actually as bad as you'd think. Did get a new broom though toward the end (and a few days later I got a call that the vacuum was finally fixed).
I mostly clean as I go, dishes, put things away, straighten the bed each AM, etc. The big chores are vacuuming and cleaning the bathroom, both of which somehow seem far more arduous than they actually are.
Also, since the vacuum "repair" left it looking like a circus vacuum, I hate looking at it.
In The Beginning, we tried to divvy up responsibilities and Share... but before long we decreed that she cooks and I do dishes. Cuz I hate doing them marginally less than she hates it, and she can actually cook edible things. We play to our strengths.
@David "Kahomono" Frier (he/his), we did that for awhile then our cleaner left town and we couldn't find a good replacement. Now that we're not working ~~I~~ don't feel as time constrained. Plus the realisation that I was cleaning to a higher standard than I felt necessary🙄
With two dogs that shed all year with bursts of enthusiasm, cleaning is a continuous process. I sweep up the leaves and stuff that they bring in, but it never lasts long. I scuff up the balls of fur from the places they gather. The kitchen stays clean, but for the most part we lead a fairly disorganized existance. Not a show place, but far from an abandoned dwelling. We have 100's of pieces of art that require periodic dusting and decobweb-ification, start at one end and by the time you get to the other...rinse repeat. Our Miele White Pearl has held up for 25 years, a tiny bit of a drag to move around, but it still sucks good.
I go through phases of clean-as-I-go, with maybe a little bit extra for a slow net cleaner situation, followed by sloth and entropy. The threat of having guests gets me a bit more active in the cleaning efforts. I tend to keep the kitchen pretty clean whatever is true with the rest of the house.
While we've got a fair bit of specialization of labor, when it comes to fundamental housecleaning (vacuum and Swiffer) we take turns every other week. Jenny usually cooks so I do the dishes. Taking a quick look around I can see that I'm a bit more -- OK, way more -- cluttery than J. Our dining table has all kinds of seeds, Dahlia tubers, etc, at the moment. We eat at the kitchen table. I compensate for the clutter by doing the great majority of the gardening work and take care of whatever needs fixing around the house and yard on a regular basis. J does a lot and I do a lot. We've come to appreciate our different strengths and abilities. Most of the time. 20 years later, we still thank each other for what we do.
Only men question women, so I'd say Lenin being a male disqualifies him on any opinion he has to offer on the subject. There exists no "Woman Question".
Ya, I like how you operate, @Peter Lindelauf because, for seed savers & gardeners, Mr. Spotless Clean is an anathema. Add on to that a person who does mechanical/electronics projects, sometimes on the kitchen table, and you've got another reason to avoid Spic & Span. I find prophylactic homes an aversion for me.
I note with interest that @Cass M mentions services as if they're free. They are not, and a pensioner's income often doesn't even come with a pension. What services there are had damn well better be free, and whomever does the job isn't likely to be able to tell the difference between gardening materials/electromechanical parts and what's really rubbish.
I try to not do things that make a mess (use the same plate and glass for food and beverages all day, keep a wastebasket in every room) then clean as I go (clean the sink before work, do a quick wipe down of the toilet, shower stall when I look at it, etc.)
I have a cluttered environment but try to stay organized so I don't have to remember as many lists of things to do. For example, you'd think that the daily list of worn clothes - underwear, socks, undershirt, button up shirt, pants, belt - would be easy to remember after a lifetime of getting dressed.
I mostly dress as social camouflage to participate in and meet exigent expectations of whatever society I find myself working among. There's little positive emotional incentive to remember the owners' expectations while blearily digging through my pile of clean clothes at 6:30 AM, holding my breath trying to ignore the cold and full bladder, and re-checking each item to make sure I didn't grab two pairs of socks instead of one. So dividing clean clothes into groups makes plenty sense.
Company and kiddo is a different matter though. They get all the plates, glasses and silverware. 😀
Uh, that's a pretty big leap @Clara Listensprechen.My time is not free so why should anyone else's be? I was happy to find, upon my dad's death, that there are services that will come take trucks of clutter away. Cheap?Depends on your wealth level, but worth the cost when people are working, living away, going through chemo etc. There are also charitable organisations that pick up stuff then sell/recycle to get the money but I also like to do a donation to help cover immediate costs.
@su ann lim hope your laundry team is less complicated than the new car🤣
Sorry you took that so personally, Cass. Facts remain, however, and one of the facts that remain is that one's relatives are burdened by their seniors and canNOT be presumed to always be available for giving free services to their elders, especially when their employment is in a line of work requiring call-outs at any hour of the day/night. Elders quite often are on their own because they're remote from where their offspring have moved to for their jobs and convincing the elder to make the move is not an option.
HA! I am here at 1:54 pm SAT because I have been doing....house work!!!! We have divided the house and I am beginning to get my part in shape...we are in desperate need to a handyman, a contractor, and a major yard maintenance person....until that miracle of skilled labor shows up at the door( until we find a name and number that answer their phone/emails) we will do as my Babushka we will make do with what we have. a one room great room combination living room kitchen is a lot harder to keep tidy than I thought it would be...I am not as messy as the cats...however Q is a neat freak minimalist and I am laid back casual boho romantic ....the decor is hodge podge and we are stuck with the wallpaper until we get someone to put up the paneling of my choice( which has change 4 times since I have been in this house) House work is never done long we labor from sun to sun
Finding contractors is hard isn't it @Nora Qudus. It seems to stay at just under enough. I'm looking at renovating our ensuite bath since we're here for the long haul. I don't expect it to be quick.
@Cass M we are on number 2 the first one demoed well but nothing was finished when he decided to take a vacation....the next guy does good work but we have not heard form him since Nov. looking for another...
Housecleaning... I've never been a big fan of that chore. I'm neat and organized, but don't do too well with dusting/vacuuming/mopping. So, there are balls of cat and human hair mixed with dust rolling around here and there under desks, in corners, and so on.
Finding contractors is really hard. I splurge on cleaning companies when I can. I usually pick up things before they come. lol And I feel guilty when they're here, even though they're getting paid. If someone paid me to do the cleaning, I'd still hate it.
I think about my mom. She was on her hands and knees scrubbing the kitchen floor. Used brushes to get the dishes clean. Put the clothes through a wringer washer and hung them outside on a line, hung in the attic during the winter. What I see as positive, is the changes in technology that are work saving. Machines do the housework that was so arduous for people (women). I keep looking for new technology that will begin to eliminate the doldrums of cleaning all together. In just a matter of 50 years, the work has been made easier. Like smart homes and smart cleaning technology is beginning to take shape.
To @Clara Listensprechen's point about people being burdened by their elders. Time was, a big family and extended network took over the care of elders. The state started picking up some slack. Now things have changed, and the government needs to pick up the whole ball of wax. Sounds like you're going through some personal experience with the issue. I am, but on the opposite side. I'm taking care of a very, very sick person whose 4 children and 7 grandchildren won't chip in. After lots of money and care has been kicked their way over many years, a little payback would help. If only out of love, not about the question of unpaid labor. Wish it wasn't so, but being on the receiving end makes it critical. That's when I really hate the big gap between the rich and poor. The government doesn't give a shit about its useless eaters.
@Cass M they need the money but do not want to do the work for it...like the painter last fall....I said I would buy the paint...he was miffed...I asked when he would scrape and repair the odd areas needed( it was only the trim of the house since it is a shingled house weathered) he said he did not do those things and his estimate did not include it( $700 to paint trim) I said revise the estimate he went off in a huff and I never head from him again....I pay no one up front here...I chose my own paint colors too. this is the nutmeg carver state.
@Cass M so far so good. I tried to get as basic a pair of possible. My theory - the more complicated a machine, the more that can go wrong and a more skilled person would be needed to repair.
You're lucky Cass, skilled, tradesfolk who do a decent job are extremely hard to come by in my neck of the woods. The vast majority would not stoop to do jobs that are not worth their while $ wise. And when one's found we've to be wary about the quality of their work.
Clutter central, here. Oddly, we both seem to be able to find whatever it is we're looking for. And, @Deb Zaccaro-Rojas, I'm the only one in this family who can properly stack a dishwasher. 😀
Not sure how easy it will be to find people to do the work but ends up paying travel expenses which is fine. People are busy but seem to be able to plan for a week out for small jobs.
Elder care is difficult and I only had a few months to observe as dad's health cratered in October and he passed away in January. It's all around hard to manage, we're lucky he could stay in his home and his wife was able to do some of the care giving. Also as she part of the Philippino community she had a lot of help from friends.
The vacuum in question was purchased over 30 years ago. Yeah, should have gotten the 50 year guarantee, but I wasn't mad about it needing repair. I was mad about the asshat repair place.
My life is changed in so many ways I don't know who to trust anymore There's a shadow running through my days Like a beggar goin' from door to door I was thinkin' that maybe I'd get a maid Find a place nearby for her to stay Just someone to keep my house clean Fix my meals and go away
A maid A man needs a maid A maid
It's hard to make that change When life and love turns strange And cold... To give a love You gotta live a love To live a love You gotta be part of When will I see you again?
We split tasks. I handle garbage and recycling, and do my own laundry. We have a decent dishwasher, so both of us will load/unload depending on when it needs done and who's available. Other tasks also get split based on who's available.
I brush outside, for that is gardening and manly. My wife brushes inside, for that is housework and unmanly. Thus proving the line between manly and unmanly is but dust.
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